in my mind the only potential buyers for my landlord's building were basically sentient hedge funds because who has 4.3 million dollars but I just remembered movie stars live in my neighborhood and honestly if I get forced out of my home by Margot Robbie or something during a strike that would at least be fucking hilarious
Pretty sure Ebon Moss-Bachrach already owns his place in Brooklyn Heights but if he were in the market I bet he'd be charmed by our setup enough to let us stay
ScarJo and Colin Jost would kick us out without even looking us in the eye, absolutely
Ilana Glazer would be fake-nice at the open house but 100% kick us to the curb
@ingrid listen gwyneth paltrow needs a room for her swords (citation needed, my memory is hazy on this)
@ingrid I've heard that Bella Thorne actually makes most of her money from being a landlord. She'd kick people to the curb without even showing up. It'd be the sheriff knocking on your door w/ an eviction notice.
@fishsauce woof!! that's awful
Ranking movie stars by probability they'll kick me out of my apartment when they buy out the building