ingrid @ingrid@everything.happens.horse

These kids are like 11 going on 80, I love it

Apparently when they played pretend Tiffany always wanted to be the character that died.
"it do be like that sometimes"
"it be like that, for sure."

"back in kindergarten Jerry threw an actual stapler at someone"
"was he like the quiet kid?"
"no, because the quiet kid usually stays quiet"

One of them just described kindergarten as "back in the good old days"

Overhead on the subway, in the context of two kids talking about video games:
"what do you do in GTA?"
"you just become an idiot"
"oh, cool"

I'm the first keynote at 9am on the last day of the conference so I am pretty sure everyone will be tired and hungover, sigh

using my stage time for this fancy O'Reilly conference keynote to tell cloud infrastructure people to unionize and pressure their employers to stop eating the planet, I guess?

Tonight I asked my class "do any of you just intermittently check the delegated strings page on the ICANN website" because I'm like this, why

One of my students told me she was so impressed that Julian Oliver mentioned me in a tweet recently and I felt so weird about it

Just compared astrology charts with my students, oh no

I can't tell if this guy on the subway explaining to a woman and a little girl how sharks have babies is this kid's dad or a guy on a date but if the latter what a powerful flirt imho

I left the conference shortly after my talk to go home to my dog because that is who I am now I guess

OK that's over, it is very telling to me that this dude only started harassing me after the cops got off the train?? Ugh I feel so gross

I'm literally wearing sweatpants and a hoodie for fuck's sake

"she's probably German or something" please send an asteroid from space to this exact location please

He is now commenting about how I look like a supermodel

It's funny because I love New Yorkers for their ability to simultaneously hate the mayor AND the cops